want it to filled with joy.. but..

as expected my 2nd nephew born earlier than the expected day..

fell glad and thank god both mother n the child were safe..

now my life getting miserable..i dont know what to do..

feel empty n zero..

like useless lil brat..hahaha

trying to make myself happy as ussual..

but it cannot happen..

always want to scream and i cant..

how i want to live like this.

just like malay words : "reda n redha je la"..

i can do both but somehow can effect my surrounding..

hua3...it just..hard to say now..

feels like loser ..maybe double loser..huhu..

lucky not to be pressure by my family..

but somehow i feel like dissapointed my family and myself..

just see what will happen to me in few weeks..

hope it will be more better than yesterday...not getting worst..hua3

AMIN..

hope can give the best for my friends and myself... :)

hua3...